One of the biggest worries I hear from parents before their Nashville family photography session is some version of, “but what if my kids don’t cooperate for family photos?” And mama, you are very much not alone in that. Keep reading to find out why I don’t need them to!
Quick answer: What If My Kids Won’t Cooperate for Family Photos?
Your kids aren’t going to spend the whole session being asked to sit still and smile. By the time session day gets here, we’ve already talked through what your family loves, how your kids play, what makes them laugh, and what actually feels like you. So I’m not showing up with a list of poses and hoping everyone cooperates. I’m giving your family things to do. We’ll play, move, cuddle, explore, chase, read, tickle, wander — whatever makes sense for your people. Your kids get to be busy having fun with you, which means there’s a whole lot less time spent worrying about whether they’re “cooperating.”
I’ve photographed enough families with little kids to know that “cooperating” usually looks a whole lot different than parents expect it to.
Maybe your toddler doesn’t sit still for more than three seconds. Maybe one of your kids takes a while to warm up. Maybe the second you pull out your phone and ask everyone to smile, suddenly no one knows how to act normal. Or maybe you’ve seen those perfectly put-together family photos and thought, yeah… but have you met my kids?
After photographing families with little kids for years (and having a few of my own) I can tell you that the best family photos rarely come from everyone being on their best behavior.
They come from giving kids something to do.
That’s a huge part of how I approach family photography. Instead of spending our session trying to make your kids perform for the camera, we plan for who they already are — what they love, what makes them laugh, how they connect with you — and build the session around that.
So if “what if my kids don’t cooperate for family photos?” is the thing making you hesitate to book, this one’s for you.
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Do my kids need to sit still and smile for family photos?
Nope. In fact, I’d much rather give them something fun to do.
Kids are usually at their best when they’re moving, playing, exploring, or wrapped up in something with you — not when they’re thinking about what their face is doing for the camera.
So we might race across the yard, pile onto the bed, play a favorite game, dance in the kitchen, snuggle on the couch, or go exploring together. I’ll give you plenty of direction, but most of it sounds more like “go do this together” than “stand here and smile.”
That’s where the photos that mama wants comes from — their real laugh, the way they reach for you, their little personalities, and all the things you already love about who they are right now.
How should I prepare my kids for family photos?
Keep it really simple. You don’t need to spend the week reminding them to behave, practice smiling, or make a big deal out of the session. I actually want them coming in expecting this to be fun.
A few things do help though.
Make sure everyone has eaten. Seriously — this one matters. Have you ever met a hangry kid? A full belly goes a long way.
I’d also skip screens right before the session if you can. Sometimes that extra stimulation makes it harder for kids to shift gears and settle into being present with everyone.
And if you’re planning to use a treat or bribe, save it for the end. If we pull that out too early, suddenly the entire session becomes about when do I get it? instead of what we’re actually doing together.
Before your session, I’ll already have asked about your kids — what they love, what makes them laugh, how they play, and anything else that helps me get to know them a little before we meet. So when session day comes, I’m not starting from scratch.
Tell them you’re going to hang out, play, explore, cuddle, run around, and have some fun together.
What do kids actually do during a lifestyle family session?
One of the biggest differences between a lifestyle family session and a more traditional posed session is that your kids are usually given something to do.
That matters because young children tend to participate more naturally when they can move, interact, and respond to what’s happening around them instead of being asked to hold one position for a long stretch of time.
I’m still guiding the session. I’m paying attention to where everyone is, how the light is working, and when I want your family to come closer together. But instead of expecting your children to stay still and smile over and over, I’m creating little opportunities for them to engage with you.
That might look like:
- Baking or dancing in the kitchen
- Playing in the backyard together
- Playing peek a boo in the sheets
- Making Saturday morning pancakes together
- Building a fort together
- Doing a craft at the kitchen table
- Playing dress up or dinosaurs in the playroom
- Going to the ball field where you spend most of your time anyway
- Doing homesteading chores together (but make it aesthetic of course!)
- Gardening in the evening together
- Running around an open field at sunset
The exact activities will look different for every family, because that’s the point. We’re not trying to recreate someone else’s session. We’re doing the things your family already loves to do so it feels like a normal day for your little ones!
What can I do as a parent during the session?
The biggest thing? Your kids will feed off your energy.
If you’re relaxed, playful, and having a good time, they’re much more likely to settle into it too. So instead of watching them the whole session wondering if they’re “cooperating,” focus on being with them.
Play. Laugh. Scoop them up. Get down on the floor. Be silly. Love on them.
And please, please don’t spend the whole session asking them to look at the camera and smile. I promise I’ll tell you when I actually need that. The rest of the time, let them stay engaged in whatever we’re doing together.
Sometimes we’ll try something we planned and your child will want absolutely nothing to do with it. That’s okay. We move on. No frustration, no making it a thing. There are plenty of other ways to get them involved.
And honestly? Keep smiling through all of it. Your child may be doing the cutest thing in the world while you’re standing behind them looking stressed. I’m photographing you too.
We do everything we can to make the session feel fun and familiar, but it still isn’t a totally normal day for your kids. They’ll have moments. That doesn’t mean the session is going badly.
Laugh through the chaos, follow my lead, and keep loving on your people.
That energy is what they’ll respond to most.
What are some frequently asked questions about kids cooperating during family sessions?
What is better for kids, an in-home or outdoor session?
Neither is automatically better! It really depends on your family and your kids. Some children light up when they have room to run, explore, and play outside. Others are happiest at home surrounded by their own toys and familiar things. We’ll talk about your family beforehand and choose the setting that makes the most sense for you.
What if one of my kids isn’t into it right away?
That’s completely fine. We don’t need everyone ready to go the second I pick up my camera. We can start with something they enjoy, let them hang back with you, or focus on someone else for a bit. There’s plenty happening during a session, so they can join in when they’re ready.
What if my child is shy or needs time to warm up?
Then we give them time! I’m not going to walk in and immediately expect your child to interact with me. I’ll usually start by talking, playing, or letting them show me something they love. Getting to know your kids before the session helps here too — I already have a few ideas for connecting with your child before we ever meet.
What if my kids are really energetic?
Perfect! We can use that. Run, chase, jump, dance, explore, climb on dad, tickles with mom — movement gives us so much to work with. I’d much rather give that energy somewhere fun to go than spend the session trying to contain it.
Will we still get a family photo with everyone looking at the camera?
Most likely yes! I won’t spend the entire time forcing one, though. The majority of the session with be very much lifestyle and I may never ask you to look at the camera again. We will focus on playing, moving, loving on your people, and photographing your family being your family.
So, what if my kids don’t cooperate for family photos?
If you’ve made it this far, I hope you’re feeling a little less worried about whether your kids are going to “cooperate.”
Because that’s really not the goal.
By the time your session gets here, we’ve already talked about your family, your kids, what they love, and what feels like you. We have a plan for keeping them moving, playing, exploring, snuggling, and actually enjoying their time with you.
Will everything we plan work exactly how we imagined it? Probably not. They’re kids.
But we don’t need it to.
We’ll follow their lead, switch things up when we need to, laugh through the chaos, and make plenty of room for your family to just be together.
Your kids don’t have to be on their best behavior for you to have photographs you love. They just need to be themselves.
And I’ll take care of the rest.
START THE CONVERSATION. CONTACT ME HERE!
Courtney Houk Photography is a lifestyle Nashville family photographer, wife, and homeschooling mama. She creates joyful, honest photographs with childhood at the center — the big laughs, the little moments, and all the ways your family is yours. Through thoughtfully planned, family-led sessions and personalized styling, she helps families remember what each season actually felt like, from growing bellies and brand-new babies to busy toddlers and big kids. Here on the blog, she shares session planning tips, styling ideas, and local inspiration for Nashville families who want photos that feel like them. If you’re thinking “this is exactly what I’m looking for”, let’s chat!
